We are creatures of habit, and we often perpetuate the very habits that we want to change. Even when it is in our best interests to change, our internal resistance often opposes the very changes that we seek.
EMPOWERMENT MOTIVATES; FEAR AND GUILT PARALYSES.
If a proposed change invokes a sense of fear or guilt in the recipient, it reduces any motivation to change. The resulting feelings are more likely to be: apathy, disinterest, powerlessness and hopelessness. What is required is a sense of empowerment, positive choice and action.
ALIGNMENT WITH CORE VALUES
In order to embark on significant change of any kind, we have to consciously and subconsciously be able to “buy into it”. This means that the proposed change must align with our core values. Alignment creates the durability required to endure the process of change, which isn’t always easy. If your core values do not align with the changes you wish to create, any changes made will usually be short lived and will not be sustainable.
We must therefore be aware of what our core values are to begin with. If we realise that our core values do not align with our desired changes, we can choose to reposition and adjust those values to fit with our desired goals. Our values then become the foundation that drives and empowers us in achieving the changes we seek.
PREREQUISITES FOR CHANGE
The following beliefs/prerequisites are essential in making and succeeding with a decision to change. Like core values, the underlying beliefs that a person has must align with the desired changes in order to achieve success.
DO WE BELIEVE THE CHANGE WE SEEK IS:
- Beneficial, that it will make a positive difference to us, to others or to the world we live in.
- Possible to achieve.
- Within our power, ability, skill, support and resources to change.
- Our responsibility and that we control of our own behaviours and reactions.
- Within our capability to implementing a specific action or behaviour.
- Worth the courage required to face our emotional vulnerability
ARE WE WILLING TO:
- Identify our resistance to change.
- Explore how our resistance actually serves or protects us.
- Examine any adverse consequences that could result from the change that we wish to make.
DO WE FEEL THAT:
- Our desire for the positive outcomes we seek are greater than the energy required to implement the changes.
- The desire to change outweighs the comfort and familiarity of our current reality or state.
- Any discomfort of changing, is less than the discomfort of the aspect that we want to change.
If we identify a dissonance or misalignment in any of the above prerequisites to change, success is undermined. This may require further exploration with a therapist or life coach.
THE SEMANTICS OF SUCCESS
When we are truly intent on making a specific change in our lives, we often need to alter the words that we use. These include the words we think as well as words we speak. We need to eradicate “CAN’T” from our vocabulary and entertain the possibility that whatever we want to change is achievable.
Instead of beginning sentences that shut down your own ability or limit possibilities such as:
I don’t; I won’t; I’m not; It’s too difficult; It’s too hard; No…..
CATCH YOURSELF and replace them with:
I could try; I’ll have a think about it; I can; I will; It’s challenging but possible; It’s tricky but achievable; Yes….
THERE ARE NO PROBLEMS; ONLY SOLUTIONS
This is not denial of the very real threats and problems that do exist for us in our lives and in our world. Instead, it’s an attitude we can adopt that supports us in moving towards solving the issues we face. A much better alternative to giving them the power to stop us reaching our goals.
Employing this solutions based principle allows us to make profound personal changes. Changes that improve our health, relationships, living circumstances, families, working lives, society, country, world and planet.
YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE!
Written by Chrissy Diamond
Holistic Alignment offers a variety of treatments to suit your unique needs. Our Practitioners Chrissy Diamond and Lorelei Messersmith will be happy to discuss any questions you may have regarding your treatment to assist in putting you at ease. Contact Chrissy to book your first Holistic Alignment.