NAVIGATING FROM SELF DOUBT TO SUCCESS
Throughout our life, we’re presented with multiple opportunities to doubt ourselves. Our past failures, comparison with others, external obstacles or challenges can all lead to a feeling of overwhelm. This can derail our best intentions to achieve our goals. Life also presents us with numerous opportunities to succeed and our success depends on which internal voices we’re listening to.
Attempting to navigate our way to success from a place of self-doubt, is doomed for defeat. Self-doubt is like a rug that we place all of our intentions on top of. Often, just when we’re on the verge of succeeding, our self-doubt will rip that rug out from underneath us. Everything that we dearly desire then tumbles down and we find ourselves powerless and pity-full.
So how do we stop sabotaging our success and dooming ourselves for defeat?
Let me share with you 5 steps that I’ve used to dissolve my own self doubt.
5 STEPS TO DISSOLVING SELF DOUBT
1: DEFINE SUCCESS
What is your definition of success? When you think of someone who has succeeded in your eyes, who do you think of?
In order to succeed, it’s vital to have a positive view of success. Sometimes we can have negative associations to those that we view as successful. For example, we may view them as arrogant, selfish, egocentric or lacking in integrity. If we have associated negative states with achieving success, our best efforts to succeed will be thwarted. This is because they don’t align with our own value system. If this is the case, we need to redefine the meaning of success to ourselves. We can then align with those values, traits, behaviours and states that we like, admire, prefer and desire.
When our definition of success aligns with our value system, our efforts to succeed work for us not against us. We then stack the odds in our own favour. What’s needed is an undivided intention to succeed if we are to experience success.
2: LABEL THE SELF DOUBT: GIVE IT A NAME
This part of the process is fun and may seem a bit silly. However that in itself is an important aspect. We need to have a sense of humour regarding our self-doubt in order to dis-empower it.
Make up a cartoon character name that illustrates the personality of your self-doubt, for example: Miserable Maude; Sinister Stephen.
Imagine what the characters look like in cartoon form and when they speak to you internally, what do they say? For example, if only I was thinner, better looking, funnier, talented, richer, etc. Perhaps they speak directly to you, e.g. You’re a loser, You’re a failure, You’re a disappointment.
I’ve given some fairly obvious examples. However the messages that they give us in the form of our own self-talk can be quite subtle. So we need to be be discerning. If you’re someone who suffers from self doubt, then you’ll likely be familiar with the self talk that derails you.
The most important thing here is to identify these characters as separate from yourself. You may have more than one character that self-doubt features as, it doesn’t matter, just label them all.
3: CATCH THE CHARACTERS IN ACTION
Identify which character is speaking to you when that internal voice of self-doubt shows up. You’ve got to be able to catch them when they’re at work doing their best to sabotage you.
These internal characters are actually just less evolved, un-integrated aspects of ourselves. We adopted these ways of being through beliefs, assumptions or decisions that we made to protect ourselves. However when they no longer serve us, WE end up serving THEM. These outdated mechanisms of protection then hypnotize us with their self defeating words. We come under the spell of what they’re saying because we have identified with them as who we really are.
YOUR SELF DOUBT IS NOT WHO YOU ARE!!
If you really want to overcome your self-doubt, its important to view these aspects (characters) as separate from yourself. They do NOT represent your innate awesomeness. You’re bigger than them!
4: CALL THEM OUT ON IT
When we identify these characters through the ways that they are speaking to us internally, we need to call them by their name. For example, “Oh it’s you “Sinister Steven” thanks for trying to protect me, but you can have a rest now.
I’m inviting you to acknowledge these negative internal voices, and give them permission to stand down. You can then re-assert your position as being in charge of your own life.
In other words, when self-doubt arises within us, we need to recognize it for what it is and simply say “SO WHAT”. Rather than being obedient to the instruction of self-doubt within us, we can take charge. So what if I have a little self doubt. I’m not going to let it stop me from doing and becoming what I want to be in my life.
5: FOCUS ON YOUR GOAL
The way that we move forward in our lives is much like driving a car. We have to see where we’re going and keep our focus and attention on what is happening in front of us. Sure, sometimes we have to use our rear-vision mirror/camera to reverse. To we can then change direction, but we then re-direct our focus to whats ahead.
Self-doubt is a bit like trying to drive forward while looking in the rear-vision mirror/camera. Instead we are best to focus on where we’re wanting to go and whats in front of us.
Our internal doubts are often anchored in the past and use historic reference points as evidence to prove that we are destined to fail so why even bother trying? Self-doubt is merely a distraction from what what we really want to achieve, attain, experience or become.
So stop allowing yourself to be distracted by those negative voices and re-focus on your goal! What is it that you really want?
If this is where you get stumped because you don’t know or you feel unsure about what you truly desire, let me give you a hint: whatever it is, it will involve joy, excitement, energy, health, love, peace, purpose, meaning, fulfillment, satisfaction, contentment and the resources need to achieve and maintain these states….so focus on attaining these states as your overall goal!!!
NO MORE EXCUSES
Saying “SO WHAT” to self-doubt is about not giving yourself an excuse to live a life of limitations, because most of the limitations that life actually presents to you are determined by you.
Yes, you may have experienced challenges, obstacles, traumas and hurts that have left scars both seen and unseen, and maybe you’re still healing from these. So take the time that you need to heal, gather around you the people and practices that support you and then redefine yourself and how you’d like the rest of your life to be.
Its up to you if you allow yourself to be defined by the doubt that erodes the self, or create a new definition for yourself, one that involves succeeding in whatever you set your intention to be, the power is yours!
All the best
Written By: Chrissy Diamond
Holistic Alignment offers a variety of treatments to suit your unique needs. Our Practitioners Chrissy Diamond and Lorelei Messersmith will be happy to discuss any questions you may have regarding your treatment to assist in putting you at ease. Contact Chrissy to book your first Holistic Alignment.