How perfectionism and Imposterism sneakily block us from living the
life of our dreams.
Whether it be professionally in business or creatively through art, it’s likely, at one point or another self-doubt has reared its head and stopped you from developing and sharing a brilliant idea or new amazing new skill/craft. It’s apparently very normal to experience these feelings, however, have you ever felt almost paralysed from taking action towards something you really, really wanted to do?! Like, there was this invisible force holding you back from getting stuck in, even though you were 100% ready to go?
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone my friend, this is something I live with, and try to overcome, daily! Heck, even writing this post is triggering. Knowing this is something I’m deeply passionate about and genuinely wanting to share with you, yet a piece of my brain is literally saying “OMG, stop! What do you think you’re doing?! You can’t talk about this stuff, you don’t know what you’re talking about and I bet none of this will make any sense”, even though, on some other deep level, I’m aware of just how capable I am, and I know I can do it! It’s such a bizarre experience, to be present to both of these experiences and sensations simultaneously, which I believe is the crazy world of;
Imposterism or Perfectionism (or Both, if you’re really lucky 😊)
So what are these beasts:
Imposterism (Imposter Syndrome)
- Imposter syndrome is the persistent belief that you are not as competent or talented as
others perceive you to be, despite evidence of your skills and accomplishments. - It often manifests as self-doubt, fear of being “found out,” or attributing success to luck
rather than ability. - It can lead to functional and creative paralysis, overworking, or reluctance to share work.
According to Dr Valerie Young, there are Five main types of Imposter Syndrome;
1️. The Perfectionist
- Believes work must be 100% flawless.
- Struggles to finish projects due to fear of imperfection.
- Tends to over-edit, over-polish, and delay sharing work.
2️. The Superhuman
- Feels they must be working harder than everyone else to prove their worth.
- Takes on excessive workloads, leading to burnout.
- Struggles with resting or taking breaks.
3️. The Natural Genius
- Believes they should excel effortlessly.
- Feels shame when struggling to learn or improve.
- Avoids creative challenges that don’t come easily.
4️. The Soloist
- Believes asking for help is a sign of weakness.
- Struggles to accept feedback or collaboration.
- Tries to handle everything alone.
5️. The Expert
- Feels they must know everything before starting or sharing.
- Constantly pursues new knowledge instead of taking action.
- Fears being exposed as “not knowing enough.”
Perfectionism (The Perfectionist)
Perfectionism is the belief that everything we create must be flawless, and while aiming for excellence isn’t all bad, perfectionism often leads to:
- Procrastination – Not starting because you fear the result won’t be good enough.
- Over-editing – Spending excessive time refining work instead of sharing it.
- Avoiding challenges – Sticking to what feels safe instead of pushing creative boundaries.
- Fear of failure – Viewing mistakes as proof of incompetence instead of opportunities to grow.
The Combo (BOTH of these Bad Boys… Ooooo yeah!)
Yes, you can absolutely be a perfectionist and experience imposter syndrome at the same time. In fact, the two often go hand-in-hand, as you can see, Perfectionism is Imposterisms #1 type, and although they’re not quite the same, perfectionism fuels Imposter Syndrome with its:
- High standards – Perfectionists set extremely high standards for themselves, making it nearly impossible to ever feel satisfied with their achievements, leading to the belief that they are not good enough and are “faking it.”
- Fear of failure – The constant worry about making mistakes or not meeting their own rigorous expectations can amplify feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt, which are core components of imposter syndrome.
- Attribution bias – Perfectionists often attribute their successes to external factors like luck or easy tasks, rather than their own abilities, further reinforcing the imposter feeling.
No matter if you experience one or the other, or both, don’t fret! You are NOT ALONE! I promise! Nearly 70% of adults either suffer from, or have experienced an episode or ten with perfectionism and 25-30% with Imposter Syndrome. So, for a topic I personally don’t think is discussed enough, there sure does seem to be a fair few of us out there that are affected.
But, why me?
These juicy shadow blocks are, as we now know, often linked and can be caused by a combination of factors including:
- High expectations
- Fear of failure
- Low self-esteem
- Early childhood experiences with unrealistic standards
- A strong need and desire for acceptance/approval, and
- A tendency to attribute successes to external factors rather than personal ability, leading to a constant feeling of being a fraud despite achievements.
Essentially (brace yourself), both stem from a deep-seated anxiety about not being/feeling good enough, which often drives us to strive for unattainable perfection while simultaneously doubting our competence. DANG!
Not all is lost: Making Friends with my Shadows
I imagine, that hurt a bit, and I also know that we’re already in a system that likes to make us feel “not enough”, so how can we, as semi functioning adults, deal with this added layer of blockage? Well, like we deal with everything else we feel we need to work on, right?! *Insert smiling sweaty emoji*
- Self-awareness – Recognize if this is indeed a pattern you’re familiar with. When perfectionist thoughts and imposter feelings arise, identify the situations or triggers that bring them on and be as mindful as you can in the future.
- Challenge negative thoughts – Actively question the validity of your self-critical thoughts and replace them with more positive, loving or realistic affirmations.
- Focus on progress – Set achievable and realistic goals and celebrate small wins along the way.
- Practice self-compassion – Be kind to yourself, you’re doing amazing and everyone makes mistakes, that’s how we learn.
- Identify your strengths – Make a list of your skills and accomplishments to remind yourself of your awesomeness.
- Seek feedback – Ask for constructive feedback from trusted colleagues or loved ones to gain a more accurate perspective of who you are and what you’re capable of.
- Set realistic expectations – Be aware of and adjust any standards that need to be more aligned with your abilities and desired outcomes.
- Professional help – If your perfectionism and imposter syndrome significantly impact your life, definitely consider seeking a support group, coach or therapist to help make life a little more manageable.
Dancing with our Shadows:
We’re all so capable of doing the things, taking actionable steps and living out our dreams, I mean just look, I’m almost done with this article and although I fought with my inner perfectionist and imposter the whole way, I’m here and I’m glad I did. Because I genuinely hope it helped.
If you’re leaning towards having either or both of these ‘shadows’, my last nugget to leave you with would be the biggest thing that helps me through it now, and that’s having a COMMUNITY.
Finding likeminded people who are in the same boat can be super EMPOWERING and INSPIRING, so if you feel this is something you want to get involved in and go deeper with, I’d love to invite you to an upcoming workshop ‘BREAKING FREE: Overcoming Imposterism and Perfectionism’. Where we can go through and understand these blocks and ourselves a little better, together!
Click the link here for more details and wherever you might be on your journey, I wish you all the best my friends.
Sarah xx
Holistic Alignment offers a variety of treatments to suit your unique needs. Our Practitioners Chrissy Diamond and Lorelei Messersmith will be happy to discuss any questions you may have regarding your treatment to assist in putting you at ease. Contact Chrissy or Lorelei to book your first Holistic Alignment.